Have You Seen This New Trend? Proposing to Your Man

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Dr. Zoe Shaw, A Year of Self-Care

Even in these modern times, proposals by women are very uncommon. The tradition of waiting for your man to buy an engagement ring and surprise you is still extremely popular. There are so many resources for men on choosing a ring and popping the question. Some men have even turned to professional help to plan flashy engagements. Today, wedding planners will also offer their services as a marriage proposal planner. Think about all of those viral videos on Facebook! If women proposed more often, then there would be no need for proposal planners. It may seem like traditional engagement is the only option, but it’s not! 2019 may be the year of girls asking for his hand in marriage. Proposing to your partner is a beautiful way to show your commitment and express how you feel about your significant other.

Why Propose

It may not have occurred to you until you saw this article that proposing yourself is an option. It’s going against the norms, but every couple is different! Like any engagement or wedding, you better have a good reason for promising to stay with your fiancé-to-be for life. Although it’s traditional to get married, you don’t want to be doing it for the wrong reasons—like feeling pressured to take the next logical step, for example. Yes, being married can be important! But a proper foundation of love and commitment is extremely critical for any couple, traditional or unique. Rushing into things, so you have a picture perfect life or relationship will most likely not end well. If you are tired of waiting for him to pop the question, then you should talk to him about getting engaged. Having that conversation about why he’s waiting or has some concerns could be a healthy way to let him know that you’re ready and bring you closer together as a couple. Talking about finances, children, and religion can be very important before even considering the idea of marriage.

You should propose to him if you feel like you can’t live without him and marriage is the next step you want to take. You’re so committed to this man that you need it to be official by the church and the government in front of your family and friends. If you’ve had many conversations about being husband and wife, then proposing to him is a great idea. Being crazy about each other and in love is essential to anyone who wants to get down on one knee, man or woman.

An Engagement Ring?

The real question is, do men want an engagement ring? If he wears jewelry often, then definitely get him a ring. But, most men don’t wear jewelry and will be only wearing their wedding ring for the rest of their lives. If you’d prefer to get him a gift, be inspired by his hobbies and passions. For example, if your man loves to exercise, then get him a pair of specialty earphones. For someone stylish, a watch or cuff links are a great idea. These are items that he can often wear to remind him of the day you proposed! Plus, he can wear them for the wedding. The important thing is to get something personalized that he will use or wear. A gift card or a pair of socks is absolutely a no-no. The proposal gift should be something he’ll always use and think of you.

Have you seen the trend of women proposing?

So you might be wondering about your engagement ring. Some traditions are meant to be broken, but what about this one? It may be vital for you that he shows his commitment by buying the ring, or you may be more comfortable shopping together. Again, if you feel strongly about it, talk to him about it or give him some hints. Leave some wedding magazines around where he can see them or have your mom (or even his!) talk to him about how much she wants you to get married and the ring.

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Unless you know for sure that he plans on buying you an engagement ring at some point, you can buy yourself one! Of course, when you buy your engagement ring, get a band for him—this will make the moment about both of you and your relationship. The proposal shouldn’t be an opportunity to buy yourself some bling or your dream engagement ring. This special day should be all about celebrating your connection. His ring will be the wedding band for the ceremony, and that’s okay! This will save you time and money because there will be no need for a wedding band later on. A great way to make it about him is to go shopping together to pick out his wedding band! You both can find rings that complement your styles, and you may find something out of the ordinary you would have never picked out alone. Shopping together will help you choose unique rings that reflect your relationship. No boring solitaire diamond engagement rings (unless that’s your style, of course!)

Depending on his taste (and yours), you can get matching bands in the same metal. If you don’t feel the need to match, get a warm toned or cool toned metal based on what will complement your skin best. If you’re not sure what you’re looking for when it comes to wedding bands and engagement rings, take a look online! Jewelers, like Blue Nile, have a large collection of engagement rings in all styles for you and your man to browse through.

Planning the Proposal

The key to any proposal is personalization. This moment is just for the two of you so it should be as special as possible! It will be about who you are as a couple and who your partner is personally. If he is an adventure seeker, propose to him at an event or an exciting place. If he loves sports, do it at a game. Be inspired by his passions, but don’t forget to take personality into account while planning. If he’s shy or doesn’t like attention, then plan something more intimate, rather than a jumbo-tron proposal. Some guys don’t get a thrill out of attracting a crowd. You know him the best and know what he will like. Even though it seems like proposing yourself is laid back, make a special occasion out of it! He deserves to be wooed just as much as you.

Begin planning the proposal at least a month in advance. You’ll need time to figure out the time and place along with getting a gift. If you’re choosing to make a more intimate proposal, recreate your first date or go to one of your favorite sites. He will love the surprise and how thoughtful you were about it. If he is especially close to his family, consider proposing around the holidays so that you can have a party with extended family after the announcement. If you love photographs and mementos, then consider hiring a photographer to capture the moment. Many wedding photographers offer a service to secretly snap pictures of the proposal to get your genuine reactions. Of course, you should only hire one if you’re entirely sure he’ll say yes.

The key to any proposal is personalization.

Popping the Question

As you’re planning the proposal and getting his proposal gift, start to think of ideas of what the speech will be. If you’re great at improvising and speaking from the heart, then girl, do you! Others may need to plan out what they are going to say or at the very least jot down some notes. You should remind him of why you love him so much and why you want to spend the rest of your life with him. If you would rather keep it simple, ask “Will you marry me?” This will also work well if you forget your planned speech. If you have something planned, don’t forget to practice it! The nervous jitters may hit you unexpectedly, so practicing, even a little, will help. Plus, you have nothing to worry about! He’s the man of your dreams and the love of your life.

Proposing to him may seem too forward, but it’s not! It’s a unique, modern twist on a beautiful tradition. You are telling your best friend that you can’t live without him and that he is the most important person in the world. You shouldn’t feel embarrassed about that! The best part about the whole thing is you’ll be able to tell a great proposal story to your family and children in the future.


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